Fairytale Football... Week 1

The NFL season is upon us and I am playing the shitty game fairy tale football once again. Every season I have high hope at the start and somewhere around week 5 I realize my played blow AND I am a curse to everyone I own. Let’s go over my roster real quick and give some predictions for this season:
Philip Rivers - Last year he had over 4000 yards passing, 34 touchdowns and a QB rating of 105.5. He played in all 16 games last season and this is a very important stat because everyone who knows me knows I have jinxed almost every player I have ever had. Don’t be surprised if he goes down with a serious injury in week 5 (their bye week).

David Garrard - Last year he had over 3600 yards passing, 15 touchdowns and a QB rating of 81.7. He played in all 16 games last season as well… hmmm.

Steve Smith - Last year he had over 1400 yards receiving and 6 touchdowns. OK so Steve played in 14 games last season; out of 8 seasons he has only made it through the complete season 2 times… will this season be different? Probably not, he will make it between 12 and 14 games but the ones he will miss will be the most important games for my team.

Dwayne Bowe - Last year he had over 1000 yards receiving and 7 touchdowns. He played in all 16 games last season (I see a pattern forming). I wonder how long he will last…

Roy Williams - FINALLY someone I wouldn’t mind talking about. I hope he plays all season long. With stats like 430 yards receiving and 2 touchdowns in 15 games… SWEET. Keep up the good job Roy!
Kevin Walter - Last year he had 899 yards receiving and 8 touchdowns. HE played in all 16 games last season too!! I have one durable team.

Devin Hester - I had this guy last season… he had 665 yards receiving and 3 touchdowns AND 877 total return yards and 0 touchdowns. Not bad, not bad at all. With a new QB I see Hester getting more involved… I predict a mid-season broken leg.

Michael Turner - Last year 1699 yards rushing, 19 total touchdowns, 16 games played… Jesus I hope he stays health all season.

Steven Jackson - He played in 12 games last season and had over 1000 yards rushing, 379 yards receiving and 8 total touchdowns. Steven will be trying had to rebound from a crappy 2008… my prediction is he will try REALLY hard and hurt himself in the process. He will play 13 games but only 8 full games.
Joseph Addai - He played in 12 games last season and had over 700 total yards and 7 total touchdowns. Addai will make it all 16 games… the sucky part is he will have similar starts. GOOD JOB J.A.
Chris Cooley - Last year he had 849 yards receiving and 1 touchdown. WAIT… 1 TD?? With stats like that he will get through all 16 games. In fact since he has been in the NFL he has never missed a game.
Tony Scheffler – Pretty good stats… 645 yards receiving and 3 touchdowns! THEN fate gives you Kyle Orton… FLIP!

Mason Crosby – I have never had a problem with the health of my kicker. This season my kicker will be out 6 GAMES… mononucleosis.
Dallas - Dallas is ranked 7 in defense according to my league. I see the entire getting sick and missing the season. Speculation is mononucleosis. *I wonder how that happened*

San Diego - SD is ranked 12 according to my league. I don’t see momo happening here but you never know… (RIP Tila Tequila, He just might kill you)

Ok so that's it... that's my team.

Dammit... that was pretty boring!

And now for my real Fantasy Football team…


… YEAH!!

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